Marriage: The Wife’s Role

Brides back

Thank you for continuing this look at marriage from a biblical perspective. In the past few articles we looked at what marriage is and is not, and we looked at the husband’s role in a marriage. Now I will look at the wife’s role.

In the beginning God had created the heavens and the earth. Once He had made all of the land, plants, and animals, God created man. Everything was perfect, except for one thing–man was alone. God said “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable for him.” ( Genesis 2:18)

After Adam had named all of the animals, God noticed that there was no suitable helper for him. So:

So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman’ for she was taken out of a man.” That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Genesis 2:21-24

Bride groom on bridge

The woman was taken from man and was made his wife. She is a part of the man and he is a part of her. Once together as husband and wife, they are back together as one.

This here shows the beginning of what was later termed as ‘marriage’. At this point there is no regulation as to what a wife is to do other than be a helpmate for her husband, however, that is a large job in itself.

A helpmate is one who stands beside and helps out in any way that one can help.

Couple holding hands

When Jesus left the earth, He knew it was not good for man to be left alone, so He sent His Holy Spirit. His Holy Spirit was to come and be the helper for all men and women. He would help them become more like Jesus. He would help them have the strength to do what needed to be done. He would give them guidance as to how to accomplish God’s mission for them. He would provide the needed comfort. He was the ultimate Helper for every person. 

Not being the Ultimate Helper, the wife is a helper for the husband. She is to help her husband out to be the best that he can be. She is to help her husband out to do the job God has called him to do.

The exact help provided will change from time to time and with different circumstances. Sometimes she will help by being an encourager, other times it will be to rebuke. Other times it may be to provide direction or instruction, while other times to be comfort. All of this is done out of love.

Blocks spell love

When there is love for someone, you will want to help that person be the best he can be for God. This is not be the best he can be for the world, but for God. It is not about self, it is not about him or her, but about God.

Several thousand years later Paul wrote to the husbands and wives. To the wives he said:

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22-24 )

Many women hate this verse or try to ignore it. Many others will try to excuse this verse away. However, it does not get rid of this verse.

Every person, man or woman, is supposed to be sold out, 100% to Jesus. They are to submit to Him in every area of their lives. He is to have the ultimate say in their lives, because He is the head.

One hundred percent

But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. (Romans 6:22 )

The term ‘slave’ is a politically incorrect term to use according to people today. Yet, this is what God calls it. As a believer, you have chosen to become a slave to God. This means that you have to submit to Him in every thing, in every area of your life. God has the ultimate say in everything.

This submission, however, is done out of love, not force. This is where the slavery of this world and slavery to God is different. You must bind yourself to God out of love.

Security lock love

As a wife, you are to submit to your husband in the same way. The only way a husband does not get the ultimate say is if it goes against God’s word. Then and only then, does a wife have a way to refuse to submit to him. This should be the exception, not the norm.

Love is the motivator in all of this submission. You are to love your husband and then you will be able to submit to him, follow him, and support him. This is being the helpmeet that he needs.

When you try to do your own thing and go your own way, you are creating division and are not one. This will not allow him to follow God’s commands to be one with his wife.

There will be times when this will be easy to do and there will be times when this is extremely difficult to do. It is no different then your walk with God–easy some times, difficult other times. Don’t give up or give in, but trust in God’s strength and leading. Remember His love for you and pass that on to your husband.

Focus lens

As you focus your life on God and trust Him with your marriage and your life, He will give you the strength to submit to your husband. He will guide you in how to be the best for your husband. Together then, both of you can grow together in the Lord.

Next week I will look at the controversial topic of divorce and what the bible says about it.

Please feel free to share this with any one you know who may be able to use this. Thank you for reading and see you next week.

Psalm 84:1 A Wonderful Place To Be

Log cabin

How lovely is your dwelling place, Lord Almighty! Psalm 84:1 

Traveling around the world there are lots of beautiful places to go and see. Each person finds different places as the best place for different reasons. Some love to be in the mountains, others deep in a forest, or on a beach, while others love being on a lake or river.

Those are people who love the outdoors. Yet, others love being inside. Some love museums, cities, in the home, or some other place.

Nothing is wrong with any of these places. Each one can hold its own beauty in its own way for whoever likes them. However, all of these places are temporary and the ones in nature point to God. The man-made ones often point to man, while some may strive to point to God.

The writer starts out this psalm stating how lovely the dwelling place of God is. He finds the best place to be is in God’s dwelling place, where God is.

While it is true that God is everywhere, man is not always in His presence spiritually even though man is in His presence physically. People have to choose to see and hear God. They have to choose to be in His presence where He is at.

Until a person is a believer in Jesus, he cannot see or know God and His presence. God is calling him to follow Jesus, but man does not always listen. Once he does, however, he can always be in God’s presence.

There is no better place than to be where God is. In His place there is peace, love, forgiveness, joy, protection, mercy, grace, direction, and more. This covers absolutely everything that a person may ever need and more. Without forgiveness, without love no one has anything of any lasting value.

As you go through your days on this earth, each day you can be in God’s presence. You can know His presence in your life each day.

Open your heart up to seeing God with your spiritual eyes and knowing His presence. Know that as you put your trust in Him and follow Jesus, God is right there and you are right there with Him. You will be in His dwelling place doing what He wants.

When you are in God’s dwelling place, you will know the peace and love that God has for you in a way that will overwhelm you.

Where are you today?

I pray today that you will know Jesus as your Savior; that you will trust God with your life; that you will dwell in God’s dwelling place; and that you will live for God each day.

Psalm 78:42 Forgetting God’s Abilities

Thumbs up

Again and again they put God to the test; they vexed the Holy One of Israel. Psalm 78:42 

Those who are in authority often have the power to get things done that others do not have the ability to do. Having the ability to provide finances or other needed resources, they can accomplish larger things than what is normal for others.

The workers at the bottom have very little authority and cannot see how something can be accomplished. All they can see is a large mountain of a problem in front of them and no way around or over it. They begin to fear the challenge in front of them, rather than trusting those in authority.

Asaph looks back at when the Israelites were wandering in the wilderness. The people would constantly complain to God and not trust Him. They had forgotten the power that He had displayed with bringing them out of Egypt.

Every believer has to believe God has some authority just to become a believer. He has to believe that God has the power and ability to remove all sin and to save the person, or else he will not follow Jesus or trust Him.

God works in a person’s life doing great things, removing sin and providing what is needed. Yet, many believers quickly forget what God has already done in their lives or in the lives of others and begin to complain to God about some challenge in their life.

The believer has been redeemed from a life of sin and death. He has been released from the bondages of sin and given a new life. Yet, often one goes back to those chains and puts them back on. He doesn’t trust God to provide for him in every area needed.

If God has the power to remove sin, He also has the power to take care of every need a believer has. This has to be remembered.

Think about the things God has already done in your life. Why did you choose to follow Jesus? What made you believe and trust Him?

Now remember those things and trust that God can meet your current needs that are looming in front of you.

Don’t put God to the test by complaining and fearing what is in front of you. God is greater than anything you may face. Remember what He has done in lives of others already and in your past. Then trust Him.

I pray today that you will see what God has done for you; that you will know you can trust God’s power and abilities; that God will help you remove all fear of situations in your life; and that you seek God for all of your needs. 

Harriet (movie review)

Harriet movie poster

Movie: Harriet
Opening: November 2019
Rating: PG

The movie ‘Harriet‘ is a movie about the life and work of Harriet Tubman. She was a black lady who was raised as a slave in the early to mid-1800’s. She was injured by an accident and was unable to be reliable help on the plantation where she was a slave. As a result, the slave owner chose to sell and remove her from her husband. Instead of being allowed to be sold, she chose to run away to freedom.

After successfully escaping by traveling on foot for about 90 miles, she chose to go back and rescue her family. No one would support her, but she put her trust in God to give her strength and favor. Over time she had been credited for going back multiple times and rescuing about 100 people from slavery.

The movie does show some of the violence against slavery. It makes it very clear the dangers of a slave running away. There is some violence in the movie, but not extreme and no extreme graphics are shown. One thing that I caution on is that there is some foul language in this film and a lot of language used against the black people, showing the prejudices of the people.

One thing that I found great in the movie was showing how Harriet had trusted in God. She would be traveling with some escaped slaves in the wild, planning to head a certain direction. Suddenly she would get dizzy and have a vision from God as to what to do. She often felt God turn her to a new direction. She would go that way, though often it did not make sense at the moment. In the process of doing that she had avoided getting caught many times.

For me this was a challenge in my belief and trust in God. As a believer, we are to fully trust God’s leading at all times. He said that He would never leave us and that His Holy Spirit would always be there to guide us on our path in this life.

Every believer needs to keep his heart open to hearing from God and obeying His every command. It may not always make sense as to why God has us move the direction He has us move, but we can know that it is for our best interests. This movie has challenged me to learn to step out in faith and trust God’s leading more in my life.

I do recommend this movie, but with caution. There is the language and his movie is not suitable for younger children. It is a great movie for middle school and up children and can lead to great discussions about slavery and following God.

May your trust in God increase as you walk with Him.

Psalm 52:8 A Flourishing Life

Olive tree branch

But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever. Psalm 52:8 

Going through this life can be difficult with the various trials and challenges that people face from day to day. Along with all of the challenges in life that many face, there is also the mundane routine of the average life.

Very few people find a real purpose in their life. They keep searching for meaning and purpose to what they are going through and often do not find it.

As people live life in this way, they are not flourishing, but just in survival mode each day. They don’t appear to be moving forward or accomplishing anything. There is no joy or peace in their lives.

David had penned these words while he was fleeing from Saul and when Doeg had betrayed him to Saul. He points out those that do not follow God will fail in the end, but that he is flourishing like an olive tree in God’s house. This is occurring because he is trusting in God.

There are many believers who are living like the world, not flourishing but just struggling from day to day. They have allowed their eyes to be focused on their problems and day-to-day struggles rather than upon God.

Although they still claim belief in God, they have lost trust in God and no longer flourish.

Those who fully believe and trust God and His word, will flourish. They will know that the struggles they have are only light and momentary in light of eternity. They will know that what is happening is for their good, because they are trusting God’s hand in their life.

Trusting in God brings about a joy and peace that the world cannot understand nor take away. This allows a person to really live and flourish like a well planted olive tree producing lots of fruit in his life.

Instead of focusing on the challenges in your life, put your eyes upon God. Trust that He knows what He is doing and what He is doing is the best thing to be done. Then rest in His control.

Allow yourself to be strengthen by His Holy Spirit so that you can live the life that He has blessed you with. You can live the abundant life that Jesus promised, flourishing, growing and moving forward. Life does not have to be mundane and dead, but full of life.

Are you flourishing today?

I pray today that you will know the life God has for you; that you will trust the path God has for you; that you will live for God; that God will help you see past the challenges in this life; and that you will know the joy of life in Jesus. 

Faith For Provision: Widow At Zarephath

Widowed woman

She went away and did as Elijah had told her. So there was food every day for Elijah and for the woman and her family. For the jar of flour was not used up and the jug of oil did not run dry, in keeping with the word of the Lord spoken by Elijah. 1 Kings 17:15-16 

During a severe famine in the land, God had told Elijah to go to a certain widow in Zarephath for his provision of food. There he asked the lady for some food. The woman said that she had only a little food left for one meal, then she and her son would die from starvation.

Think about this for a moment. Here is a lady and her son about to eat their last meal and die and this guy comes up to her and wants her to make him some food first. This sounds selfish and rude. Most people would tell him to get lost or sorry that they cannot give him any food.

Pancakes

Giving up the last of something you have to a complete stranger would be difficult to do, especially if it meant life or death for you or someone else you love. In order to do something like this, it would take a great step of faith. You would have to first know that you are doing what God wants, then you would have to trust that God would meet your needs.

Elijah told her to trust that God would provide and still to make the food for him. The widow chose to trust Elijah and God and decided to make the food for Elijah. As she made the food, somehow God continued to provide the needed oil and flour to keep making more food.

Man stepping of cliff

Stepping out into faith will sometimes require to give up something that you need. In doing this, you are trusting God to meet that need in some other way.

Often people trust their own abilities to meet their personal needs. They trust their job, bank account, experience, and more, rather than have faith in God. Choosing to do your own thing will not show faith in God, but faith in self. In the process of trusting self, you will not be able to see the provision of God in your life.

A life of faith will not be focused on self. It will be focused on what you can do for others knowing that God will meet your needs. When Jesus came to this earth, He came focused on serving life to every person. He trusted His Father to take care of Him and meet His needs. This included laying down His life. He had faith, that if He laid down His life for others, God would raise it back up again. And He did.

Empty tomb

If the widow had not trusted Elijah and God, then that meal most likely would have been her last meal. God would not have provided for her, because she would not have trusted in Him, but in her own abilities. Yet, her actions of trust allowed God to provide abundantly for her needs.

As you see a need in someone else’s life, you may have the ability to meet it, but in the process may create a need of your own. In seeing this, you may not see how you can help the other person out, without jeopardizing your own life. This is where faith steps in. Trust God to meet your needs.

In the same way you may be meeting the need of someone else, God may have another person waiting to meet your need. Or God may doing some miracle to provide for your need as you step out in faith.

Helping hands

Do not hold back helping someone else out when you have the ability. This is a way to shine God’s love and provision into the life of another person. It is also a great act of faith on your part. Trusting God to touch the other person through you. Trusting God to meet your needs. Trusting God to help you provide for others.

Think about ways you can step up to help meet the needs of someone else. How can God use you to touch someone else’s life? If God could provide for he widow…If God provided for you in the past…then God can provide for you again in your time of need. Trust Him. Have faith in His abilities.